20 seconds…
I’ve wasted 20 precious paid moments of my life staring blankly at the monitor, and if not for my seatmate who repeatedly snapped his fingers in front of me just to catch my attention, maybe that time counter will still go on and on and on for God knows how long.
I don’t know… I’m not feeling sleepy… It’s just that… I’m… I’m lost somewhere… Deep in my thoughts, or maybe I must say, I am more lost inside my broken heart… What the heck! When did I start to be like this? When did I learn to mix my personal life with my work…? Maybe just yesterday… when everything about us started to mess up.
It’s never my style to get out of focused, or to think of something else while I’m at work.
Most of the time, I try to stop and cry for a while, compose myself and bounce back afterwards. But this time, I can’t figure out a way to keep my hands on one thing and forget about the rest just for the meantime. Why? I’m thinking about him! There is nothing more important to me than that. Or so I think.
I know it’s wrong…
As a team member, I am of course expected to uplift the spirit of my workmates, but how can I do that when I can’t even bring myself to sanity. As an employee, I’m expected to use my resources, especially my time for the company’s benefit, but I’m beginning to forget how to do that too.
I know this too shall pass… When would that be? I don’t really know. All I know is, I’m not okay and I have to live with it until such time that I can laugh and blab like nothing happened.
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